Yesterday I learnt a very valuable lesson. That life is short and anything could happen to anyone at any point in time, with no warning at all. Mostly though, it's when something bad happens that it hits home the hardest. A reality check that leaves us feeling gratitude towards being healthy and happy and above all, alive. It generally springs us in to action, we go for that extra walk, we eat the salad, we stop and read that book.
But what about when we see our friends putting themselves out there, chasing that dream of theirs and winning at life, smashing goals. Do we stop and genuinely feel excited for them? Let their excitement feed our own journey? or is there another little green emotion that comes out in us? Your response would be determined by where you are in your own life. If you were feeling positive, naturally you would feel positive for the other person, but what about when you are feeling like you are in a shitty place in your own life - then how do you feel? Pained, tortured, jealous, poor me? Does this then feed into your RUT cycle and continue to fuel it?
Next time you are faced with a similar situation, imagine that it was you in their position - you would want the person you were telling to be happy for you, wouldn't you?... practice Empathy. Even if it isn't fully reaching your heart, don't be the person to hurt theirs. Be open to feeding off their positive energy and let it lift you up, don't drag theirs down.
I went searching for an article that would help support my above suggestion, but what I found was something so much more. Instead, it beautifully supports all that I am engaging with along my current journey. Healthline has a beautiful article written by Rebecca Joy Stanborough in 2020 (which also happens to medically reviewed by Marney A. White), it highlights the power of our vibrational energy and their functions "vibrational energy experts claim that certain emotions and thought patterns, such as joy, peace, and acceptance, create high frequency vibrations, while other feelings and mindsets (such as anger, despair, and fear) vibrate at a lower rate." Despite the lack of research regarding this concept, what there is, is "evidence linking positive emotions and thinking patterns to better health and greater goal achievement". https://www.healthline.com/health/vibrational-energy#benefits
So would it be fair to say then, that being happy for our friends, can help us in turn be happy for ourselves? "When our emotions change different chemicals are released into our bodies, these chemicals force us to see the world through a new lens and as a result our perception changes." www.2knowmyself.com
Go easy on yourself, if you find yourself not being 100% happy for someone else, remind yourself that it isn't how you genuinely feel. Your perspective will change when you manage to increase your vibrations. But remember it will take work. I've already suggested a number of ideas in previous posts, www.healthline.com supports many of these, yoga, plant based eating etc... what I did love was the reminder of how important Reiki is. I've only ever had it done once but absolutely loved the experience. I considered having it a second time, but then I felt bad thinking about my poor Reiki lady and all the negativity that I had running through my body at the time, I couldn't bring myself to subject her to that, instead I struggled on. Connection- discovering this article and having run into her down the street recently, perhaps I need to take the sign and book a session.
Importantly, don't underestimate the power of digging deep and putting into practice some techniques of your own and get yourself out of that bloody RUT, out of the table drain, and back up into life's slow lane.
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